Sisters! Chore distribution is definitely the number one killer of marriage/cohabitation!😭 My girlfriend and I almost broke up over this before. We argued every day about who would wash the dishes or mop the floor, and it felt like love was being worn away by housework!
But! Since I used these tricks, my girlfriend now volunteers to do chores every day and says, “Honey, you’re working hard!” It’s just too good! 😎 Today I’m sharing my exclusive secrets to ensure they willingly join the chore army!
1. Abandon “Should,” Embrace “Negotiation”
- Danger Zone: Never think “Chores should be done by girls/boys”!🙅♀️🙅♂️ This idea is really outdated! Times have changed, equality between men and women, the home belongs to both of you, and chores should of course be shared!
- Correct Posture: Sit down and talk! Make a list of all the chores, including:
- Daily chores: washing dishes, cooking, mopping, taking out the trash, washing clothes, tidying up the house…
- Recurring chores: changing sheets, washing windows, spring cleaning…
- Unexpected chores: repairing water pipes, changing light bulbs…
- Negotiated Allocation: The two of you assign chores according to your time and energy. Remember! It must be fair! Don’t let one person bear too much!
- My Experience: My girlfriend and I allocate according to “expertise + time.” For example, I cook faster and she washes dishes more efficiently, so I’m responsible for cooking and she’s responsible for washing dishes. On weekends, we do some chores that require cooperation, like spring cleaning.
2. Let Them See the “Value” of Housework
- Danger Zone: Don’t take housework for granted!🙅♀️ If you do housework but don’t get recognition, anyone will feel wronged!
- Correct Posture:
- Timely Thanks: Every time my girlfriend finishes a chore, I sincerely thank her, saying “Thank you for sharing this for me, you are great!” Let her feel that her efforts are being seen.
- Praise Details: Praise them for keeping the house clean and tidy, such as “You mop the floor so shiny! It feels so much more comfortable to walk on!”
- “Value” Embodied: Let them know that the housework they do makes life better. For example, after cooking, enjoy the meal together and tell them “Thanks to the meal you cooked, we were able to eat so healthy and delicious!”
- My Experience: I often hand over a glass of water or put on a song she likes when my girlfriend is doing chores. These small gestures can make them feel your care and consideration.
3. Introduce an “Incentive Mechanism” to Make Housework More Fun!
- Danger Zone: Housework itself is very boring, and if there are no rewards, it is easy to lose motivation!
- Correct Posture:
- Points System: Get corresponding points for each chore completed. Points can be redeemed for rewards such as seeing a movie, eating a big meal, buying something you like…
- Rotation System: Rotate weekly to take on certain chores, which can increase freshness and avoid boredom from doing the same chores all the time.
- Gamification: Turn housework into a game! For example, time who can fold clothes the fastest and best, or compete to see who can clean the glass cleaner!
- My Experience: My girlfriend and I will periodically conduct a “Chore Showdown,” and the loser has to give the winner a massage! This not only gets the housework done, but also increases interaction and fun between couples!
4. Show “Weakness” Appropriately to Stimulate Their Desire to Protect
- Danger Zone: Never try to be strong! If you tire yourself to death, they won’t feel sorry for you, but will think you deserve it!
- Correct Posture:
- Act Cute in a Timely Manner: Occasionally act cute with them and say “I’m so tired from work today, I don’t want to do housework~” Stimulate their desire to protect and take the initiative to help you share.
- Show “Weaknesses”: Frankly tell them that you are not good at doing certain chores and ask them to help.
- Ask for Help: If you are really too busy, just ask them for help directly and say “Dear, can you help me clean up? Let’s be quicker together!”
- My Experience: I had a cold once and directly told my girlfriend “I feel so bad, I don’t want to move”, and she took the initiative to take on all the housework and took care of me, which I felt was super touching!
5. Ultimate Secret: Robot Vacuum Cleaner/Dishwasher!
- Save Time and Effort: Technology changes life! Robot vacuum cleaners and dishwashers are definitely artifacts for freeing your hands!
- Reduce Conflict: With them, you don’t have to argue about who sweeps the floor or who washes the dishes anymore!
- Improve Happiness: Spend more time enjoying life instead of wasting it on tedious chores!
Summary:
There is no absolute right answer for chore distribution, the most important thing is to find a mode that suits you. Remember, equality, respect, and communication are key! I hope these little tricks of mine can help you and make housework not a stumbling block to feelings, but a catalyst to enhance feelings!💖